$SNM
SnailMoon Founders Arrested For Being Too Slow
Law enforcement made the arrest after a brisk 45-second bicycle chase.
SnailMoon
The real SnailMoon.
Local
Local Man Buys All-Time High Despite Several Warnings From Himself
After a 10-second discussion with himself, local man decided $SHIT was the best financial decision.
$SNM
SafeMoon Accused of Copying SnailMoon's Branding
SnailMoon has never even heard of SafeMoon according to the team.
Local
Local Man Flees Country Instead Of Trying To Calculate His Crypto Taxes
"If you'd seen my 40,000+ shitcoin transactions in Metamask, you'd understand."
$SNM
SnailMoon Reaches Record Slow Speed
The record was celebrated by the four people still active in the Telegram chat.
Finance
Police Report They Still Haven't Found That One Guy Rugging Everyone
"I don't know who Ethereum is or why he's selling rugs but we'll catch this guy."
$SNM
SnailMoon Wins Award For Lowest Market Cap
The $SNM community is proud that their hard work shilling has paid off.
Finance
Project Rugs While Man Has First Shower In 5 Days
The man removed his last $24 ($7 after gas) and sat in silence for 10 minutes.
Finance
Community Panic Holds
"The last time there was FUD, the token I was holding went down 90% in 4 minutes."
Finance
How To Not Sound Unemployed: A Crypto Investor's Guide
Step 1: Don't ever mention cryptocurrency.
Finance
Local Man Holds Shitcoin Until Heat Death Of The Universe
Dust to dust.
Finance
Top 10 Ways To Soft FUD Your Investments In Telegram Chat
The moron's masterclass in staying poor - beginners welcome.
$SNM
Crypto Project Builds Bridge
The SnailMoon team will be paying outright for the development of the bridge, with costs expected to amount to around $12.
Finance
Crypto Investor Confused By Green Number In His Portfolio
Friends of the investor have been forced to explain what the green numbers and plus sign meant.
Finance
Investors Shocked To Discover "Inu" Means Dog In Japanese
This revelation has caused confusion as many investors had assumed that "inu" was simply a random string of letters that sounded cool.
World
Fiverr Distances Itself From Developers Who Made Shibarium Bridge
"We were not aware that developers were offering to create an Ethereum bridge for $5 on our platform."