World

Gary Gensler Found To Be Rare Variety Of Talking Peanut

Evil scientists succeed in creating a talking peanut to spread FUD about cryptocurrencies.

SnailMoon

Jun 6, 2023 — 1 min read

It has been revealed that Gary Gensler, the current chairman of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC), is actually a talking peanut.

The discovery was made by a group of scientists who were studying a shipment of delicious peanuts that had been imported from China.

As they were inspecting the peanuts, one of them noticed that one of them was moving. When they took a closer look, they were amazed to see that it was actually a talking peanut.

The talking peanut identified itself as Gary Gensler and explained that he had been transformed into a peanut by a group of evil scientists who were working for the Chinese government.

The scientist's goal was to create a talking peanut that they could use to spread propaganda and misinformation about cryptocurrencies.

Gary was able to escape from the evil scientists and make his way to the United States. He then contacted the SEC and told them about what had happened.

The SEC was able to track down the evil scientists and send them random lawsuits and other assorted pieces of paper.

Gary is now living a quiet life in Washington, D.C. He is still able to talk, but he prefers to keep a low profile. He is also still a peanut, but he has learned to embrace his new identity.