Finance
Solana Foundation Announces Release of World's Fastest Toaster
The toaster is said to handle speeds of up to 2TPS (toast per second).
Finance
Finance
Police Report They Still Haven't Found That One Guy Rugging Everyone
"I don't know who Ethereum is or why he's selling rugs but we'll catch this guy."
Finance
Project Rugs While Man Has First Shower In 5 Days
The man removed his last $24 ($7 after gas) and sat in silence for 10 minutes.
Finance
Community Panic Holds
"The last time there was FUD, the token I was holding went down 90% in 4 minutes."
Finance
How To Not Sound Unemployed: A Crypto Investor's Guide
Step 1: Don't ever mention cryptocurrency.
Finance
Local Man Holds Shitcoin Until Heat Death Of The Universe
Dust to dust.
Finance
Top 10 Ways To Soft FUD Your Investments In Telegram Chat
The moron's masterclass in staying poor - beginners welcome.
Finance
Crypto Investor Confused By Green Number In His Portfolio
Friends of the investor have been forced to explain what the green numbers and plus sign meant.
Finance
Investors Shocked To Discover "Inu" Means Dog In Japanese
This revelation has caused confusion as many investors had assumed that "inu" was simply a random string of letters that sounded cool.
Finance
BitBoy Celebrates With Legal Team After Raising $200,000
Armstrong's new financial advisor Candy will be in charge of the newly raised legal funds.
Finance
Tesla Adds 2nd Display For Shitcoin Trading
"My Tesla was able to automatically change my destination to the bank so I could declare bankruptcy."
Finance
Jerome Powell Accidentally Leaves Money Printer On All Weekend
Powell is expected to raise interest rates by 950 basis points to begin to combat the resulting inflation.